I recently spoke at our church women's breakfast about courage to trust God when He asks something big of us.
I feel like one of God's biggest asks of me is to mother my three beautiful children who are all close in age. It's not a big ask because they are horrible kids! Its a big ask because I have to trust that God knows what's best for me even when I'm in the thick of it and I don't feel cut out for having twins.
Don't get me wrong - I love the girls more that anything and I know how completely blessed I am to have them, but sometimes I wonder whether I would be a better mum if I had had them one at a time!! I am learning that having courage to do what God calls us to is hard - especially if it wasn't what we planned!!
I love the verses in the bible which tell us God's plans are to prosper us. Most of the time I have no idea what God is trying to teach me through my kids - I imagine patience is high up there on the list and maybe multi-tasking. But I do know that when I am standing at the school gates, in the freezing cold, with two kids screaming at me to sit in the buggy (even though I asked them five times if they wanted to go in the buggy and they insisted they wanted to walk), God is there - and his purposes are good. I hope I always remain teachable.
The past couple of months has been a bit of a rough season for our family and I know there are more challenges ahead in the coming year. Lots of my friends are facing additional parenting challenges alongside the usual ones and it is not easy. But I do feel able to say that God is good - He proves that to me again and again through new mercies every day. I know that what Jesus did for me on the cross was costly and so I know that today, I can trust Him to ask big of me in the knowledge that He is in it with me.
And so I pray for the grace and humility to let God do as He wants with me and to use me for His glory.
